She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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