my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
