Kiss
Puke
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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