He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
