you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
