worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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