I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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