I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
