dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
