She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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