Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
dude. I can hear the air.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
