I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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