It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize