she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
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she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
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You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Holy shit dude........stairs
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