question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize