i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
