Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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