my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
there was a trapeze. enough said
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
