Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize