i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
420 ftw
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
