he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize
