My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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