I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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