guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize