its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
