It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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