come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
