Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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