Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
