READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
