I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
