I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
