there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
