There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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