He kissed a someone with a penis
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
