He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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