You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
