they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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