12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
