I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i barfeds in our rink
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
