Midget sex pt 2 tonight
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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