My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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