When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
