I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
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At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
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Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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