i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
