Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize