i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
