i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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