why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
