Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
