Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm both gender and math confused
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
