so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
